Unaware of my future relationship with Mark, I first met him at his wedding. Rachel and I grew up together, our families connected through church. As I sat and watched Mark and Rachel marry I would never had guessed our lives would connect again. My friendship with Mark started because of our boys. Aidan and my son Cade entered their first year of soccer on the same team and Mark was one of the assistant coaches. After the first practice we set up a time to have some coffee. As became custom, Mark was always on time and I was always running late. I am not sure I ever walked in to meet Mark when his head wasn’t buried in his iPhone. He was writing email, updating his blog, downloading some cool app, or controlling CalChambers from some new plug-in he installed.

After connecting for coffee the first time I remember thinking – this is a special man. I committed myself then and there to walking this journey with Mark – he didn’t have a choice – our friendship was birthed and the journey began.

I spent many hours with Mark talking about life, about family, about sickness, about struggle, about God, about faith, about Jesus, about hope, and eventually about death.

Mark was a fighter. He knew the statistics, he heard the stories, he was well aware of the possibilities and outcomes associated with brain tumors, but he refused to allow them to control how he lived his life. I don’t believe there are a lot of brain tumor patients out there who were going to chemo treatments during their lunch breaks, attending their child’s soccer game just days after gamma knife surgery, updating blogs immediately following brain surgery, or finding new ways to kick a soccer ball or throw the football with their son.

When he was alive he was alive to live – to live life to the fullest. Mark loved to live and he was fun to live with.

I personally had some great fun moments with Mark. I learned he loved the Lakers quickly into our friendship and connected with one of my friends to get VIP seating at the Lakers/Kings game during the 2010 season. Although Mark was unable to walk the stairs on his own – we walked them together. We stood in the tunnel together as the Lakers stretched and prepared to exit the tunnel onto the court, we toured the King’s mascot SAMSONS DEN; moments he loved.

Mark had a great sense of humor. He wrote on his blog one day regarding an MRI:

“I’m glad I have an iPhone.  As I was ready to leave today for my MRI at 11am, I looked at my calendar.  It was in there for next Thursday!  Sheesh.  I have a brain tumor – what’s your excuse?!” MARCH 4, 2010

Or after Christmas Day, he felt couped up and restless, he wrote: “There aren’t even any bowl games on – not even the Toilet Bowl brought to you by Dow Chemical.  Sorry – my humor’s not there.” December 26^th 2008

Mark’s sense of humor still came out in spurts in the last weeks of his life. Just when you think he was not thinking clearly he would jump at you with the Mark we knew. Rachel and I were in the kitchen talking 2 weeks ago when Mark was rolled back into the kitchen. He rolled up to the table and the first words out of his mouth were, “Can we get Van Halen to play at my memorial service?” And then he smiled. We sat there for the next 5 minutes and joked together like there was no illness, no disease, no confusion. He informed us that he needed to go to the bathroom, we ignored him and kept talking. I stood up to leave, gave him a hug, and he grabbed my hand. As I stood over him he looked at me and said, “I’m going to shake your hand as I piss on your leg!”

Mark loved impacting the world through his blog. Mark started the blog to share his music with the world noting as a sub-point that he was entering into a trial in his life. His blog turned into a platform to help those struggling with this same disease and their family members. He had readers from all over the world. People would come to his blog for information and inspiration. He often talked about the impact of his blog becoming one of the purposes of his life. Listen to some of the impact he had through his voice, his blog.

“Mark became, for so many of us… a teacher, an example, a mentor, a prayer partner, a cheerleader, a hero, a pioneer and a human being to be admired and emulated.” ROBIN

“I am so saddened to hear the news about Mark and his mother. I have checked his blog daily for almost 2 years now. He was the first person who gave me info that helped me thru some really rough days with my husband, Marc, who is going thru this same journey. He educated me (us) on his illness and gave me so much insight. I have prayed for ya’ll. I think I am his #1 fan. My condolences to you and the boys. I have 2 small children too. May the boys always remember how wonderful, smart, talented and caring their father was. He touched many lives. I feel honored to have crossed his path.” STACEY – BATON ROUGE, LA

“Mark…your courage and way you’ve lived life to the fullest is an inspiration to all whose lives you’ve touched. Have peace in knowing that you have made a difference in this world.” MARK H

He was committed to knowing more about his treatment than most people so he could have a plan allowing him more time with those he loved the most and so he could encourage the those going through a similar journey.

Mark loved his family. Eventually Mark had to stop working and that was hard for him. However, not working allowed him to live life to the fullest with his family. Mark talked about how the time he spent with his boys when he stopped working was amazing. He felt like his connection with Keegan grew and consistently talked about how special his times talking to Aiden were to him. He loved their deep discussions about God, about soccer, about anything. Aidan, your Dad absolutely loved you with all his heart and he told us about it all the time. He loved throwing the ball with you in the backyard or attempting to kick the soccer ball; he loved helping coach soccer and being on the sidelines cheering you on – I believe he will always be there.

He wrote on his blog about Keegan: “I’m not working but so far my most important accomplishment is how much more I have fallen in love and bonded with my son Keegan.  He’s almost 3 (July) and I have never spent this much time with him.”

He loved his trips with Rachel, the family Safari weekend, and anytime dedicated to being together. He told me Rachel that this isn’t the way he expected life to go for you both – however, he said as hard as it was, he was so thankful to have you. In the last 2 months he constantly bragged about your strength, your organization, your willingness to take care of the Doctors appointments, medicines, and everything else in life. He knew you loved him and he knew you were a gift.

Mark loved so well through this journey because he knew he was loved. He knew he was loved by family, friends, and most importantly he drew strength in the fact that he was deeply loved by God. He did not blame God for his illness – he found strength in God. By faith he believed the promises of God were true, real, tangible, and for Him. Mark knew that God never intended for sickness and illness to ruin a life – God created Mark to live forever and yet this world full of brokenness invaded God’s plan.

From the beginning of the scriptures we see the greater story. Man chooses against God’s plan resulting in pain, illness, and brokenness to enter the world. This choice has resulted in death. Prior to this choice man and God enjoyed life as he intended – life in paradise; where the dark clouds did not represent sorrow and the sun shined brighter than any concern – life was perfect. God’s creation was intended to live with God in this reality forever. When God created man and woman he said this is really good. This is what I want. The longing of every human soul, whether realized or not, is to be back in paradise, free from death and disease, hurt, and pain.

God hates death – it wasn’t his original plan. To bridge the gap between his intention and our reality God entered the earth in the form of man, Jesus, to ultimately restore our lives to his design.

“For God loved the world so much that he gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life. ¹⁷ God sent his Son into the world not to judge the world, but to save the world through him.” JOHN 3:16-17

Jesus restored hope in what is to come – a future reality without death, decay, disease, tears, hunger, anger…this was Mark’s HOPE.

“Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see.” HEBREWS 11:1

This is represented on Mark’s license plate, on artwork given to him by his Mom, and written on his heart as a life verse. Mark, and very unexpectedly his mother Jo, both are experiencing what they hoped in as their reality. Given the opportunity to reenter this world Mark would not – life is being experienced in perfect with God. Life is being experienced free from the effects of a brain tumor, his tears have been turned to smiles, his anguish has been transformed to joy.

What Mark would want for each of us today is to experience a taste of heaven on earth. Today he would want your tears to translate to smiles – your pain to be transformed to joy – he has been healed, he has won the fight.

For many of us Mark actually comforted us in our times of struggle with his illness. This comfort he gave us-through his words, his blog, his relationship-has taught us how to comfort one another.

“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, ⁴who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.” 2 CORINTHIANS 1:3-4

Mark is experiencing the compassion and comfort of God a loving Father. Today we ask and have faith that the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort will pour himself out on us. We ask that the assurance of Mark’s present reality comforts our discomfort and pain. We ask that the hope of our future reality with God free us from the hopelessness of physical death.

This was Mark’s strength. In closing, Mark’s very own words:

“I personally walk with God. How people go about it is a personal choice. For me God is in the middle of everything – the air we breathe. He decides when it’s time. Until then, each day is a gift to spend time judiciously with my kids, family, friends and doing things that are fun!”

“If there is one thing I’ve learned through all of this it’s that we all have trials in life. Call them problems if you’d like. If you aren’t in the middle of a problem now you are than other one to solve soon or you just came out of the problem.  They build endurance and character.   No one knows why trials of this magnitude occur. Why do young children have cancer? I don’t think any of us can answer those questions but what I do know is that the next life in eternity is a great place. There is no sorrow or grief. No worries but getting to a perfect place requires living in an imperfect place that is essentially a long lesson in humility. I don’t know about you, but humility is something that is a lifelong piece of work!”

“This is about faith, hope, strength and continuing to push the best I can. The disease may be beating me physically but it can never take who I am, what I have accomplished and will accomplish together with God and the undying love I have for my wife, children, family and friends. It will never do that and cannot ever do that – to any of us.”

“I also know that, for the most part, dark clouds clear in time and the sun breaks through again.”

“The fact is, I’m going to heaven soon where there is no pain, sorrow or grief- only perfection, only eternal joy, happiness.”

“Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.” PSALM 23:4

We love you Mark. Thank you for leaving us with an example to follow and a HOPE to believe in.